Have You Met the Single Men in Fresno?

I was silenced on the spot by mortification when the other day at Thanksgiving my sister-in-law's father blurted out, "So it's been like 4-5 years since I've seen you with a guy." I basically stated I had dated a guy for like 5 months and that didn't work out and yeah...said "Have you met the men in Fresno?"

So it's not like I haven't made an attempt to meet men, oh I have and probably much more than you think. I'm just a little reserve about it. But I thought I would have a little sense of humor and talk about the types on men I come across along and why they aren't my cup of tea. 

The Gamers

I'm not just talking about video games, I'm talking those cards games too. The ones that all the nerds played Freshmen year of High School. Take it video games are cool, but when they list them as their interest in the first sentence of their profile, uh red flag! Besides I've found video games is code for "chubby" i.e. inactive and sits on their butts a lot. 

The Muscle

Yes, there are plenty of hot men out there with really big muscles, tans, and big smiles. But do I really want someone who spends 3 hours a day at the gym? Besides I'm not really into huge muscles. Big muscles and someone who spends hours at the gym seems like someone who is selfish and self-centered. I want someone healthy, but I need attention to and I fear that they will be to into their own needs to meet my needs. 

The Overly Eager

You send them a message and they send one back. You're busy with a job, gym, life, etc. and you are still maybe feeling this guy out to see if you want to really talk to him. You read his message, but don't reply immediately. They continue to send you a "How's your night going?" message. You still don't have time to reply. Then they send a message asking you a question and then a good morning message. I'm sorry, but that reaks of desperation. Play it cool guys and wait for us to reply before you blow up our inbox. 

The Tattooed and Pierced

I'm an old fashion girl. In my early years of work a guy (who had a fair amount of tattoes) told me he didn't like tattos on girls. He compared them to graffitti and said that he thought women were already beautiful canvases and didn't need it. I feel that way about myself and I'm proud that I have no tattos. Take it I don't mind some tattoes, but there are so many men that are covered in tattos. I feel the same way about men, as I do about myself. We are beautiful and we don't need all that art on us. Besides, some of the tattoos are is just creepy, strange and sometimes demonic looking. You have to wonder what goes through their mind when they decide to put that on themselves.

Honestly I could go on and on, but I don't have all night. My point is I'm just looking for a normal clean-cut guy, with his stuff together and have his priorities straight. I'm looking for a confident man, who doesn't hide behind video games, obessess over "beach" muscles, doesn't seem desperates and isn't covered in tattos. Is that too much to ask?